Easier To Lie
by DearJanuary
Summary: Palex/Jalex! Alex wonders if it's best for everyone if she just lies about who she is.
1. Chapter 1

EASIER TO LIE

**EASIER TO LIE **

Chapter One: Here Comes A Regular

She tossed her uniform shirt from the movie theatre onto her bed where it joined a growing mountain of dirty clothes. In her black work pants and a boring white tank top, Alex laid down on her back on the small clean space on her bed, folding her arms behind her head. She didn't want to think, she couldn't be alone with the silence tonight. It had been a whole day almost to the minute when Paige told her she couldn't be with her. In Paige's words _"I'm not like this, Alex. I don't like girls."_

Alex knew Paige was lying. You couldn't kiss the way they would and not mean something. That wasn't just fun and games. Alex knew what meaningless touches felt like, she had stayed with Jay for three years and it hardly held any purpose.

She wondered why Paige was feeling so ashamed about the truth. Should Alex feel that way? She was never embarrassed by hers and Paige's relationship. Before she could keep hurting herself with thoughts, her house phone began to sing wildly.

"Lexi, honey, can you get that?!" Her mom shouted from the living room. Alex imagined one of the mobile phones was sitting right next to her mom on the couch but, she got up and gathered the other one from the kitchen counter.

"Hello?"

"Alex, hey, it's Marco." Cheerfully, on the other end, he said.

"What's going on?" She mumbled while heading back into her bedroom, closing the door tightly behind her. She could hear loud music pumping on the other end of the music. "You sound like you're at a zoo."

"Close. There's a party on Henderson Highway. Spinner's cousin's house or something, you should come by." He suggested. "There's a lot of people here." Marco had talked to both Paige and Alex after they called it quits and he was mostly concerned for Alex's well being. He didn't her to stay holed up in her apartment for days. That pale skin of her's needed sunlight, he figured.

As much as Alex couldn't stand the silence in her world right now, she really didn't want to go to a party either.

"Nah, I think I'm going to stay in tonight. As much as doing keg stands with a bunch of Barbie and Ken dolls sound."

"Alex, please, come out. I'm worried about you."

"I'm fine, Marco."

"Will you come out for me then? Because I could use back up here."

Alex wanted to say no. She wanted to turn him down but, she envisioned his infamous "Del Rossi Puppy Pout" and she could never refuse that. It was too much.

"Fine. I'll come for an hour but, I get permission to cut out early if it blows."

"Good enough for me!" Marco grinned and gave Ellie a high five since she was standing in front of him. "Ellie's going to drive by and get you, okay?"

"Whoa, Ellie is there? Since when was she all about the party scene?"

"She's trying it on for size. Now, go get ready. No sweatpants." He teased.

Marco didn't lie at all. The party house was overflowing with people that from afar if you stared at the house it looked like it was throwing up drunken teenagers. The lawn had scattered people in different states all over it. Alex and Ellie both rolled their eyes on the way up to the door.

"Let's just find Marco, okay?" Alex told Ellie as soon as they got inside. They held hands to stay together since it was vacuumed sealed tight inside. They made their way through the crowd and noise to find Marco hanging out with Spinner, Jimmy and, much to Alex's unhappiness, Paige.

"Hey, you came!" Drunkingly Spinner threw himself against Alex and squished her in a hug.

"You smell like trash." Alex told him and helped him off of her before walking away.

"Damnit. I'll be right back." Marco swallowed hard and wandered after her. "Alex, come on." He sighed.

"You invited me here knowing she was here."

"We're all friends, okay?"

"No, she stopped being my friend the moment she walked out." Alex corrected him harshly.

"Don't go, come on. This could be good for you." Marco tried to sell the idea of partying but, Alex just wouldn't have it. She rolled her eyes and scoffed harshly. She wanted to run out of the house but, it was too crowded. She wanted to smack Marco but, that seemed far too melodramatic.

"I need a drink." She simply muttered and took off in the opposite direction in hope to find somebody's booze to nab.

Alex impatiently waited behind a young kissing couple in the line for the keg. They looked like freshman and it made her boil with anger to know two fourteen year olds were blessed out over one another and the girl she loved didn't even want to hold her hand.

"Hurry up!" Alex shouted over the line. The guy at the front laughed and stood up straight to look over the heads.

"Hold on, girl. The tap's broken." Jay shook his head to display how irritated he was. "Oh man, Alex?" He broke into laughter when he saw her there.

That was the icing on the cake for Alex. There was no way she was going to bide her time at a party where both Paige and Jay were hanging out. Still, it was too crowded for her to rush out and Jay met her as she was making her way out of the kitchen.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, putting his arm up and leaning against the wall, so she couldn't walk any further.

"Leaving." Alex tried to pull his arm down but, he was stronger than she recalled.

"Come on, I didn't think you'd be here. I heard about you and _her_. I'm sorry. I know you're pretty crushed out."

"You're not sorry, Jay, so don't say it."

"Lexi, you could clearly use a drink."

"You bet your ass so, get out of my way." She went to walk under his arm but, it proved to be too difficult.

"I've got a mickey," He opened up his jacket a little for her to see the glass bottle of Jack Daniels inside. "Share with me?"

Alex knew how Jay worked. He didn't just give you something without expecting much more in return. Still, she could use something to take the heat off the night and blur her mind if only for a little while.

"Yeah, let's go." She turned around and headed to the back door, so they could drink copiously out on the back porch.

The two ex-lovers, who were really ever only good at hurting each other, found a small spot at the side of the house where they could be alone and drink. Jay found himself kneeling down on the ground with his knees to his stomach, the buzz hit him but, he definitely wanted more. Alex sat against the neighbor's house and polished off the whiskey.

"I want more." She sighed, her eyes fluttering closed.

"Pace yourself, Lex. I've got some 151 in the trunk of my car but, let's wait."

"Since when were you responsible?" She hiccupped.

"I'm going to ignore that comment."

"Were you being responsible when you screwed around with girls in the_ ravine_?"

"When will you put that behind us?" He sighed, exhausted of that subject. He did feel bad.

"Whatever. Let's go get the 151." She pushed her hands on the soft grass and tried to push herself up but, it was pointless. She fell right over and landed in the neighbor's bushes.

"Whoa, slow down!" Jay laughed and jumped onto his feet to help her up.

"I'm fine!" She shouted and pulled her hand out of his as soon as she was back on her feet.

"Thanks, Jay, for the booze and for helping me." He muttered behind her.

"Thanks Jay for screwing everything up!" She shouted while stumbling through the grass and to the front where Jay was parked.

He shook his head and followed her closely just in case she collapsed on the ground. As soon as they managed to get to the front of the house, Jay decided they'd make it to his Honda a lot faster if he carried her.

"Put me down!" She shouted, over and over again, pounding her fists into his back.

"Man, you're a handful." He said as he walked down the street to his car which was parked six houses down. Once they got to where his car was parked, Alex had given up with getting Jay to put her down. He opened up his passenger seat door and shoved her inside. "You need to cool off." He closed the door behind her and went to retrieve the bottle of 151 from the trunk.

Jay opened the bottle once in the driver's seat and took a long burning sip from the bottle. He gasped to let the burn slip out of his mouth with his breath and then handed the bottle over to her.

"You know, Jay, we worked very well together." She admitted as she led the bottle to her lips, ready to get more plastered.

"I know that." He nodded.

"I hate that you cheated on me."

"Me too. I was a lot dumber make then." He confessed, staring down at his hands on his lap. He did look ashamed of what he had done.

"Oh, boy," She sighed and took another sip. "Oh, Jay," She put the bottle down in the cup holder between them. "Don't be sad, Jay. Don't." She mumbled, her lips slathered with Bacardi. "Just be with me again." She mumbled and sat up on her knees on the passenger seat and pressed herself onto him, kissing his lips, hungry for affection.

She knew she still loved Paige, why else would she be pretending she was kissing Paige's neck and not Jay's? But, Paige had made some good points last night. There was a lot of judgment when they were together and things were complicated. So, Alex lied to herself and to Jay and slipped back into him. She could lie. At least, she wouldn't be alone.

Alright, not the greatest chapter, I can admit that but, I've got some big drama planned for the upcoming chapters. Read and review, please. Let me know what you think.

Here Comes A Regular - The Replacements


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two: One More

Chapter Two: One More

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything Degrassi related or Degrassi.

The afternoon sun forced Jay's eyes to peel open slowly, sticky from being held together so tightly. He grumbled while rummaging around in the seat and massaging the newly created kink in his neck.

A bottle of 151 lay empty between his legs. And that's when he remembered. Last night, Alex's lips breathing over his and their hands running all over one another's sticky skin. He grinned just replaying it over in his memory. He moved the bottle from between his jeans to underneath his car seat then, turned over with a grin already content on his face.

He was stunned as soon as he noticed that the rest of the car was empty. Alex was nowhere to be seen. There was no way he could've imagined all of that. Alex was his girlfriend again, that wasn't a dream. It couldn't have been, no way. He leaned foreword and adjusted his rear view mirror so he could see himself. He tugged at his tee shirt to reveal two different kidneys that were red like oven burns. As sore as they appeared it was proof that last night was real. Unless, he was drunker than he recalled and somebody else had made those spots on his neck. Jay shook his head and fiddled his car keys from out of his pocket and started up his orange Honda Civic. Right as he was going to step on the gas, a loud rapping on the window made him jump in his seat. He rolled the window down as soon as he saw Alex standing there was a paper bag in her hands.

"Jesus, Lexi, you scared the shit out of me!" He told her.

"Keep your voice down." She said. That's when he took notice to her groggy eyes that were as thin as a paper cut. Her skin was dry from all the alcohol she consumed and she felt like her headache could erupt at any moment.

"Where'd you take off to?" He asked while she reached in through the window and unlocked the car door.

"Hang over food." She said while climbing in and very quietly closing the door behind her.

"Anything for me?" He asked, peering over her shoulder to get a glimpse into the bag.

"I got a danish." She pulled out the lemon flavored pastry and held it up for him to see. Without a word, just a silly grin that could make Satan himself nervous, ay leaned down and took a giant bite out of Alex's breakfast, smearing icing sugar all over his lips.

"Thanks!" She shoved her hand against his chest. "Get your own." She looked over her lemon danish that now had a giant missing piece and wiped off any Jay germs from it.

"Here," He reached into his glove compartment that was in front of her, purposely leading his hand down her leg, and retrieved a pair of his sunglasses. "Put these on. It'll help the headache."

Reluctantly, Alex took the sunglasses from him. She knew they would help take the edge off the pain she was feeling thanks to last night. The details of the evening were very foggy but, she could recall the highlights. She beat herself up in her head for allowing herself to be all over Jay but, she knew what she had said to him. Maybe, he could fill the void for now. The way her mother had raised her had helped her develop very impressive pretend playing skills and she knew she could let herself go through this.

"So, last night was a blast." Jay pulled out of his parking job and took off down the quiet residential street. He always, very secretly, wanted to live in suburbs and own a house on a street like they one they were on. Where wives and husbands gardened together with caring expressions drawn all over their faces and children played contently on the driveway with chalk and skip ropes, but he kept that wish all to himself.

"Yeah, I think it was." She rubbed her head and began to munch on her danish. The tart lemon cream inside always helped soothe her sore throat when hung over.

"You remember what happened with us, right?" Jay worried. "Like, we're together."

"I know." She said like it was nothing.

"Good." He agreed while waiting at the stop light. Quietly, he reached his hand into Alex's. It made sense to him, it always had, but it surprised Alex how normal that felt. As much as she wished she had gone home with Paige last night, she was where she was and she knew she was loved when with Jay.

Alex carried a plastic bag of groceries while walking down the nearly bare streets in the Degrassi neighborhood. She let the bag slap against her legs. She was on her way to Jay's apartment complex where they were going to watch the game. She'd picked up a bag of pretzels at Jay's request. She hated pretzels; it was like eating salted cardboard. Alex understood no real purpose for pretzels. They weren't potato chip replacements and they weren't filling, they were just calories.

She rounded the corner while counting the cracks on the sidewalk, repeating in sing song the rhyme in her head: _Don't step on a crack or you'll break your mother's back. _

It was predictable that she'd crash head first into Paige Michaelchuk, who was coming from the opposite direction. Paige was on her way home from Hazel's.

"Whoa, sorry." She immediately said. Even though she was nursing a hang over, Paige thought Alex looked beautiful. Radiant was the word she would use. "I didn't see you."

"It's okay." Alex went to walk past Paige and carry on on her way but, Paige spun around and began to talk at her.

"So, I saw you leave with Jay last night." She said.

"Yeah. What do you care?" Alex turned right around to watch Paige with the look that Alex usually used to intimidate those younger than her.

"I just thought you were over all that. Besides, he always treated you like trash."

"And you treated me better, Paige?"

"Alex, I'm not ready, okay?" Paige walked closer and said truthfully in a thick whisper. "Don't put this on me."

"I'm late." Alex didn't want to stand around to hear anything more from Paige.

"Where are you off to? I'll walk with you." She tried desperately to make nice with Alex.

"I'm going to go see my boyfriend, Jay." She said things that way just to see Paige's face tighten and her eyes to sink from being hurt.

"Have fun." Paige spat and then turned around to wander home.

"Yeah, we will!" Alex shouted and then huffed the whole rest of the way to Jay's place.

R and R, please!

Easier to Lie - Aqualung

One More - Hanson


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE: Relief Next To Me

**CHAPTER THREE: Relief Next To Me**

_DISCLAIMER: I don't own Degrassi._

Jay lay on his back with the covers only covering his bottom half. He was panting in an attempt to steady his breath. A child-like smile fell right into place on his smile and Alex could tell, it would take some severe damage to make it vanish.

She didn't understand. The two of them used to have mind blowing sex that included scratching, screaming, pushing, pulling, swearing, and sometimes bleeding. That's how they liked it and that's what made both of them so passionately raw for one another. It made no sense. They were still Jay and Alex. How come no fireworks lit off? She was bored. She found herself missing Paige's little butterfly kisses the entire eleven minutes and six seconds.

Jay on the other hand was pleased as punch with himself and to have Alex back. In his life, the sun was shining bright.

"That was awesome." He let out stupidly and then followed it with a, "Whoo!"

"Yeah, whatever." Alex sat up and grabbed her underpants from the end of the bed and became to step into them, foot by foot. "Let's watch the game. We missed the first five minutes." She groaned, carelessly.

"Whoa," He reached his arm around her stomach and tried pulling her back, but she never budged. He finally sat up and spoke to the back of her. "What's going on? Was it bad for you?"

"No," She shrugged her shoulders and lied. Alex then stood up and jumped into her pants while doing up the top button. "Well, it was kind of boring."

"Boring?" Jay was insulted. "No way. It must be you." He scoffed.

"Thanks." She rolled her eyes knowing he didn't mean that at all. She looked around the room for her top and bra on the floor.

"Well, come on, what would make it better?" Jay watched her and thought about it. "Oh, is this because of your lesbian stint?" He said very patronizingly. Alex couldn't believe he called it a stint. She felt so degraded. "Why don't you invite one of your friends tomorrow?"

"If you think you're getting anything tomorrow after today, you're high."

"What?!" Jay didn't follow.

"Don't call it a stint, Jay, okay?" She shouted, finally finding her bra by his door. "It is - It was…I don't know, just, shut up, okay?"

"Is this about Paige?" Jay frowned his eyes while grabbing his shirt from over his lap, without any idea how it wound up there, and he rolled it up to pull it over his head.

"No!" Alex didn't want to be reminded of the girl she was crazy for. She especially didn't want to hear Jay say Paige's name. "It's not. I'm over her. I hate her."

She sharply stated. It came out of her mouth so easily, but she felt it pull at her insides to day that.

"Are you sure about that, Lexi?" He asked while finishing putting his jeans on and then cornering his topless girlfriend against his bedroom door.

"Yes." She said rudely and then pulled his head down by the neck and kissed him like she used to when she wanted to make the rest of the room jealous or get him erect.

"Now, let's watch the game." She let him go quickly, making him shake on his feet.

Then, she slid out of his room while putting her top on and wandered into his family room where a family never actually sat.

Jay went to get the chips Alex had brought over from his kitchen. He had earlier thought that he heard Alex murmur Paige's name while having sex, but that assumption was erased easily after the kiss she'd just given him. He heard Alex's phone on his kitchen table next to the grocery bags beeping.

"You got low battery, Lex." He shouted at her in the other room.

"Meh, I'll charge it later." She didn't care. What was she going to do about it at his house?

Jay slyly opened up the phone and went through her call history. He was happy to see Paige was only at the bottom as a received call. The only thing that bothered him was Alex had put her name as: **Paige M. 3**

Jay knew he was getting played and as much as that hurt, he decided to leave things the way they are. He had Alex, at least somebody was pretending to care about him and that was better than usual.

**XXX**

Okay, I'm not sure if this chapter was much good, but I fel I should update. I've got some plans coming up, but I do love suggestions and ideas from you guys. R & R.

A/N: It's supposed to say Paige M. and have a heart sign next to it but, I don't know if it's showing. Thanks.

Relief Next To Me - Tegan & Sara


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four: Got A Hold On Me

**Chapter Four: Got A Hold On Me**

One arm out his car window with a lit smoke loosely hanging between his fingers, Jay sat driving behind the wheel of his car with a hard stare on the road stretched out ahead. He and Alex had been offically make together for a week and two days and so far, they'd accumulated six fights, eighteen arguments, thirty six disagreements, between the two of them. Just as silent as he was, Alex was slouched down in the passenger seat with a pair of broken avator sunglasses hiding her angry glaring eyes from the world. Tightly, her arms were crossed over her chest and a scowl was sat obvious on her face. It was only two minutes ago that the couple had finished fighting over whether or not Jay was supposed to pick Alex up from school. She claims that she had said she was going to walk home, but he swears that he told her he would pick her up at three thirty on the dot.

It wasn't until Alex noticed Paige walking with two of her friends from Degrassi with her large tote bag straps thrown over her shoulder, that she smiled. She simply missed just being around Paige and listening to the sound of her voice. She missed watching Paige walk, how her arms moved in metronome with her legs and her curves sashayed to a rhythm that could only be heard in Paige's head. Most of all, she just missed kissing those lips that always tasted like honey from the Bee's Wax Balm Paige wore to prevent chapping.

Alex lurked up in her seat and pulled her shades up her face and left them to sit on top of her head. She moved closer to Jay and pulled his cigarette from his lips before blocking his view and pressing herself against him as she played with his hair and let her lips massage his aggressively.

"What was that all about?" Jay watched her sit back down in the passenger seat, a stunned expression written over his face. Alex stared back out of her window and looked for any kind of expression on Paige's face that would let Alex know she was jealous. Alex giggled when she realized she had one the immature little battle. "Give me back my smoke, will ya?" Jay took one hand off the steering wheel and took his cigarette back and placed it back in his mouth where it belonged. Mindlessly, he got a glimpse out his rear view mirror and saw Paige on the sidewalk walking behind their car. He rolled his eyes and felt a sort of twisted roll in the pit of his stomach. He was being used and he knew it, yet he wasn't going to just give up on his second chance with Alex Nunez. "What's your mom making for dinner, you know? He tried making conversation with his sassy girlfriend.

She was too busy staring out the window and thinking about Paige and what she might think of her at that moment. Alex had also decided that though both Jay and Paige were different kissers and good ones, Paige tasted way better than Jay's tobbaco chewing tounge.

"Oh, I don't know. I'll probably head up cooking. Something you want?"

"How about pizza?" He suggested.

"We'll just order, I guess." She lifted her shoulders up just to throw them back down. Easily, she slipped back into thoughts of Paige Michaelchuk.

X

"Oh, Jay, baby!" Alex's mom pushed her plate that had only her uneaten crusts and a little marinara sauce stain left on it. She threw her arms around her daughter's boyfriend once more. Surprised, Jay almost spilt his beer bottle all over the table, but he made sure to make a quick save. "We missed you around here! Didn't we, Chad?" She nudged her loaded boyfriend and he only grunted and raised his beer in Jay's direction as his way of agreeing with his girlfriend.

Alex sat on the opposite end of Jay around the small round kitchen table. She was bored, the whole charade was ridiculous and even though Jay wasn't uncomfortable at all, she was embaressed by her mother.

"Thank God, little Alex came to her senes and got you back, eh?" Mrs. Nunez's kissed Jay's cheek and held him closely. "You are just a cutie."

A perfect excuse for Alex to get up from the table, knocking erupted against their apartment door.

"Alex, get that." Chad mumbled, but Alex was already on her way to the door from the kitchen nook.

Alex combed out her hair with her fingers while outstretching one arm to open up her door. She was unprepared for the surprise of seeing Paige standing there with her fist up in the air ready to knock again. Alex scurried out into the hall, closing the door tightly behind her.

"What are you doing here, Paige?" Alex scoffed, nodding her head at Paige and rolling her eyes off to the side.

"I came for your hospitality, obviously." Paige taunted her. She knew just which buttons to push of Alex's.

"You intreuppted dinner." Alex bluntly pointed out. She didn't care if she was being ruse, Paige broke her heart. She turned around to go back inside but, Paige was quick to rebuttle.

"Really, Alex? You're going to treat me like that." Paige shouted. Alex turned around and for a nansecond, she was worried that Jay might hear them.

"After you treated me the way you did, I think I have the right to walk away from you, yes."

"Alex, this is stupid!" Paige stomped on the thin carpeting of the apartment hallway and shut her eyes tightly for a second. She was tryign to grasp onto her self control. "Why are you with him?"

"Because you aren't with me!" Alex raised her voice and shoved the fact in Paige's face. She didn't even take time to think her thoughts through. "There it is."  
"Alex, I'm just scared! I'm not ready. That doesn't mean I don't want to be with you. I'm just so…confused." Paige was aware that she sounded cliché, but she was being honest with both herself and Alex for the first time. "I like you. I can't stop thinking about you."

"Well, too bad, Paige." Alex backed up, pacing herself. She knew if it wasn't for the angry thoughts racing through her mind, she would already have Paige pinned up against the other wall and their bodies against one another. "I'm with Jay now."

"He doesn't care about you!" Paige grabbed Alex's attention again and kept her from going back inside her place. Alex turned around and waited for Paige to speak again, she wanted to hear whatever else Paige had to say. "Not like I do. You and him might work together, but you know you and I work better."

"Why are you saying all this, Paige? Are you trying to mess with me? I thought you were scared and confused."

"I am, but I'm willing to give it an honest try now." Paige stepped foreward and grabbed both of Alex's hands in hers and the two girls stood there together in silence, yerning for one another and smiling.

On the other side of the door, unbeknowst to either Paige or Alex, Jay was listening. Though, Jay didn't always get what he wanted, he was still damn competitive. He wasn't going to just let Alex go, this was his second chance with her, they were working things out, Paige left Alex, she had her shot, she blew it. In Jay's mind, Paige didn't desereve another shot with his girlfriend.

Grinning mischeviouisly, Jay applaued himself in his head for knowing Alex so well. It would be easy to play this game, he figured.

"Hey." Alex breathed out when she wandered back into her apartment. She didn't know Jay was standing so close to the door. She turned around to lock the door and avoid his stare. She felt guilty for playing with him.

"Who was that?"

"Just some kid's playing around. I set 'em straight." She rolled up her shirt sleeves and shrugged like it was no big deal.

"That's my Lexi." Sweetly, he tilted his head onto his shoulder and grinned. He moved closer to hold her against him, kissing under her ear. "Man, this is great, huh? You and me. This is how it should be. Everybody thinks so." He whispered, hugging her against his chest.

Alex was trapped now. He was right. Paige was right. Alex was speechless.

Whoa, sorry it took me so long to update. I just had a small bit of writer's block. I think it's all better now.

Read and Review, please!!

Got a Hold on me - Hanson


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